Kelly Adventure Journal

Dear Diary,
I hadn’t been back home for very long but I was starting to get comfortable. I had missed the trees and animals of the Sylvam while I was away. But just as I was getting back into the rhythm of things some messenger some the Lords find me. Damn it, I was told that people wouldn’t be able to track me, how the hell did this guy find me. Yes sure I was hanging out at the house that they build for Mom but still. And it had Her name on it so I should probably go. Last time I disobeyed something like this I became a druid. Hell if I disobeyed this time who know what would happen.

Crap, I have to go to the keep.

I hate that place. It reeks of humans.

Dear Diary,
Great so it looks like I have to go away again and if it wasn’t bad enough they are sending Balkara’s insufferable brat with us. I understand that city people are the most miserable types of people that you can find but, seriously, can any person be more insufferable than Darius. He is miserable, he is rude, he smells worse than any other human I’ve met, he has the etiquette of…of… well i don’t know what it is but I think an Ogre would make better company. And I’m stuck dealing with him for the course of this ‘assignment.’ Seriously the gods must really hate me.

On the good side They are sending Fortus and Kale along. I get along ok with Fortus, and I don’t really know Kale, he seems stuck up but at least he is really good looking, for a tall-folk.

So anyway I guess some farmers on the frontier are having their livestock slaughtered and it is up to the forgotten children to find out what is going on.

Dear Diary,
We have been traveling for several days. I can tell Gray doesn’t like being used for a mount all day, its not like he’s a horse or a pony. But he is strong and determined, he won’t let those horses be better than him. Silly wolf pride. He has been very glad when it has been time to make camp, he finds a spot and curls up to go to sleep, waking only for some food.

So far the travel has been easy. Fortus makes a pretty good guide, though admittedly I think even Darius could have let us this far. Unfortunately game has been scarce. It would be nice to have a nice fat rabbit or two to throw in the pot at night but we haven’t been able to find anything. Either this is part of the problems that are happening on the frontier or all of the game can hear Darius’s complaints and smell his booze.

After about 4 days of traveling we came across a farmer with a wagon load of meat. It turns out that he’s a local farmer and decided to slaughter his herd instead of letting it get slaughtered. I managed to get a good deal on some meat, Gray will be happy with that. Anyway, we chatted with the farmer for some time and he went on his way. He did tell us to check with a local farmer named “Meryl” (who we later found out is actual Merryl) since he has been hit the hardest. We said our goodbyes and continued on our way.

Not far from where we met the farmer I noticed some cart tracks leading off of the road we were on. Following them we found a cart being guarded by a goblin. I may not like goblins much but he was still very lucky that I was there, I’m sure that if the others had their way they would have just killed the beast. Anyway, so the goblin and I discussed things for a but and a short time later some of the rest of the raiding party showed up with a cow, or at least most of it. Now I am sure the others were just itching to slaughter these guys like they slaughtered that cow. But that just isn’t right, the goblins are just trying to get enough food to feed themselves and the rest of their clan. Besides, if we just kill them then more would just come, we need to stop them from killing and stealing the livestock. So with that in mind I asked the leader of the raiding party to deliver a message to the clan chief, I wanted to meet with him and see if we could come to an agreement of some sort. The Goblin agreed and my companions and I ran off to see what all of the commotion was on the other side of the a hill.

On the other side of the will we came across a fierce battle. well if you consider a fight between goblins and farmers to be fierce. Oh yea and this is where we met Merryl. To say that Merryl is eccentric is like saying… well I don’t know Merryl is bloody weird.

anyway fight among goblins and farmers, and along comes the lest favored sons of Whitekeep to the rescue.

The Goblins were quickly dispatched by the Son’s with the help of the Farmer, his son and a farmhand. And then the Ogre showed up. an Ogre wearing a harness to pull a wagon. Well the ogre turned the farmhand to goo and then Merryl somehow turned the Ogre into a very large bunny rabbit. This, for some odd reason, gave Kale a hardon for both the bunny and for Merryl.

Seeing how we had had such a rough day we decided to crash at Merryl’s farm for the night.

Dear Diary,
So Kale wanted us to find that bloody rabbit for him, and I had a meeting with the goblin chief to try to put an end to the raids on the farms.

Fortus and his whiskey swilling brother went to find the rabbit while Kale and I went to meet with the goblin chief. I would have killed for wildshape that day, all Kale talked about was that Bunny Rabbit and something about stroking Merryl’s shaft. I really didn’t pay much attention.

I must say that the meet with Tam, the goblin chief, went fairly well. He told us that the reason the goblins are raiding the farmsteads is because all of the big game in the area has gone missing. Tam also agreed to an arrangement with the farmers; they leave out some meat for the goblins and the goblins stop killing their livestock. I don’t expect the farmers to put out anything they could sell for the goblins but it will still be difficult to convince the famers to go with the plan. Luckily with Kale’s help we were able to convince the farmers.

so we returned to Merryl’s farm to wait word from fortes and His brother.

When Fortes and Darius got back they informed us that they found the Bunny, much to Kale’s delight, they also found some ogres, also much to Kales delight (although Fortes seems pretty excited about fighting the Ogres as well). The Journey and the fight with the Ogres went fairly well. We won! and nobody was seriously injured. We also found a shattered farm cart suggesting that the ogres and the goblins are working together with the farm raids. And we found a passage in the back of the Ogre den (which had become a rabbit hole. and yes he have gotten the bunny to calm down with us around). So of course what do we do? we go deeper into the rabbit hole.

Dear Diary,
We shouldn’t have gone down the rabbit hole.

The entire place was invested with Stirges. The little blood suckers almost killed fortes and Darius. and then while they were recovering Kale managed to find himself in an ooze that come out of a crack in the wall. It took almost off of my alchemist fire to save him and by then he was almost dead. So maybe it wasn’t the brightest of idea’s but it worked out well, we stayed in the stirge nest till everyone recovered. And then we found the tomb of a druid (and Darius almost died again. He fell down a hole. AND HE KNEW THAT THE HOLE WAS THERE WHEN HE FELL!!!!).

And if that wasn’t bad enough we decide to go Deeper into the rabbit hole

Dear Diary,

Ok deeper into the rabbit hole wasn’t as bad as I feared. A lot of dire rats and the Rat Lady. It seems that we were in her home and she wasn’t to happy about it. But she did know about the Ogres and that they are working for a witch. Her name is Tessa by the way and once we got her talking she was quite a bit nicer. If we find a ring and a scabbard for her then she will tell us more about the witch.

Seems like a fair trade. We did invade her home and kill her rats. And we need all of the information we can get if we are going to report back to Whitecliff and have any real information for them.

Dear Diary,

Enter Burl. The ever present goblin scout who has been following us around. Not a bad sort really but he isn’t going to get himself hurt if he keeps following us. but he did have some useful information for us. See it is a good thing I didn’t let the others kill him and the rest of his clan (yet). It seems that some of the Goblin scouts found a pile of corpses, some wandering undead and a small tower.

Off to the tower!

What Burl didn’t mention was that some of those wandering undead were zombie ogres.

they hit hard, just ask Fortes.

and they were the ogres that we killed at the bunny den.

So we were dealing with a necromancer. what joy this job is turning into. We’ll see if Mom gets any flowers from me this mothers day.

It gets worse too.

Living in the top floor of the tower is ‘something’ a something shrouded in darkness, with claws, a beak and bat wings. sounds like a dragon to me. It wasn’t but I sure thought it was. So we decided that going through the top of the tower, past the ‘dragon’ and into the tower itself to hopefully deal with the necromancer was a much better idea than going through the front door, fighting whatever undead are surely there and then fighting the necromancer.

I still stand by the decision despite the disastrous results.

We got our butts kicked by the necromancer (goblin by the way), the ‘dragon’ and his zombie ogres. Fortes had to be carried out by his brother and I quickly followed with the healing beads.

Oh wait.

It gets worse.

So while we were fleeing for our lives, the darkness thing decided to go eat the human’s horses (Gray was smart enough to get away, he found me later I was very happy to see him). So we how had to flee on foot.

Then finally fortune decided to smile on us and here comes Kale to our rescue, and he brought a paladin some cleric who is more full of herself than Kale is. Well beggar’s cant be choosers so we mounted up with them and tried to get away.

then the darkness found us.

it killed most of the horses, and Rick (the Paladin).

but we defeated it and managed to get away.

Today sucked. I don’t want to play adventurer anymore.

Dear diary

Today was a good day.

Guess who met on the road today on our way back to Merryl’s?

That’s right Burl. Except he was hogtied and at the mercy of the necromancer.

The necromancer was demanding why we were getting in ‘their’ way, blah blah blah, we invaded his home, killed his friends, whitecliff has no authority in this area (some of that sounds disturbingly familiar, I may have to take a second look at Tessa). I wasn’t in a mood to talk to him so I hit him with a couple of thunder stones and we kicked his butt right there in the middle of the read.

It felt good.

Dear Diary,

So guess who brought us our replacement horses and took Rick back to the city. No not the necromancer.


Now its official, we have been ordered to deal with this issue.

Dear Diary,

The necromancer’s tower isn’t nearly as scary in the day time when there isn’t a ‘dragon’ and necromancer in it. It looks like he had some useful stuff too. We decided to clear out the rest of the wandering undead from the necromancer’s hijinks’ and see if we could find out who or what he was working with.

Tomorrow we are off to fight the ogres, and hopefully get that ring and scabbard for Tessa.

Dear Diary

When peoples’ parents want to see them they do it in a variety of different ways. Most people’s parents just yell up the stairs or out into the field in which they work. Things are a little different when your parents wield the type of power that the parents of my companions and I have. Come parents will send an avatar of their god to deliver their tidings. Some with actually just show up uninvited to wherever they hell you are, and after they tear you a new asshole for what you were doing 2 minutes before they showed up and who you were doing it with they tell you what they want. and some people have little birds deliver notes for them.

I know this because I was woken up by a hummingbird in my facing carrying the tiniest scroll I’ve ever seen. How my mother can write that small is beyond me. Anyway I was told to go meet my brother somewhere. So just when we are getting ready to assault an ogre den and rid the area of their ugly I have to go see my brother.

But of course duty calls, and if I don’t go I may get a more personal message from my mother, which will probably include a swat and a lecture about what I was doing and what I was doing it with (it was her animal companion for gods’ sake you would think that would give me a little but of leeway Seriously its not like it was my fault, she should have known better, I don’t even want to think about how she learned to do that either).

So we went and managed to meet up with my brother who was delivering us a package: our very own giftwrapped -g-nome (the g is silent. I don’t know why they don’t just spell it nome Ok fine for now on its officially ‘nome’ no I can’t change the first one quills don’t have erasers). So we traded our smelly human for a Nome, the smelly one being the horn dog brother of Fortes.

And I must say I soon found out that it was a trade up. He has yet to try to touch my butt, he shares his wine instead of being constantly hammered, he bathes, and, unlike the rest of us, actually wants to be here. And he actually can do the stealthy trappy stuff without almost dying. He didn’t even get hurt opening a trap.

We may just survive this after all. Now if we can just trade up that snobbish elf cleric things wont suck quite so much.

So anyway on to the Ogre den, and let me say: I am really beginning to dislike goblins. After fighting some wargs and goblins to get into this cave that they are all hanging out in devising dastardly plans or awaiting orders from the witch or whatever, we find a whole mess of them and had an epic battle.

Of course during this epic battle I am shot with arrows, hit by a ballista bolt, stabbed with a spear, and ummm… I think that’s it but it hurt.

and of course as you can tell from the fact that I am writing this, I survived the battle, oh yea there were some ogres involved as well. And Kale some something about a griffon (I think we need more horses again) and how he loves herpies or something. And Garrett (that’s the nome, no the G is pronounced in his name, because its Garrett nor Arrett. Ok fine its Arrett now).

So now we need to get the she-elf over in the spoon so we can rest up and continue to clear this cave system of the uglies.

I know that doesn’t make much sense.

Dear Diary

Today I learned a few very important things.

The first and most important thing I learned today is that Kale is just a pretty face. sure he managed to find a secret door and all that but he just happened to fall into it before Garret had a chance. And while he may have found the door, in combat the door won. yes seriously our great and powerful sorcerer (who’s ego is bigger than the keep) lost in a fight with a door. And then he spent the rest of the day sleeping. I think he was faking it for the most part, his ego couldn’t handle the fact that he lost in solo combat to a door (and it was a door that we couldn’t see.. until it was pointed out to us). So we ended up waging war on a shit ton of goblins, a few ogres and a giant were rat ogre chieftain…ess. I almost died and Kale was off dreaming of… of… I don’t know what but giver how perverted he is it was probably some orgy involving Merryl, a Dwarf, Burl, and his big ass rabbit.

The next thing I learned today was that Spider Bear is AWESOME!!!!

Seriously, when Jerrik first started to train me he never mentioned how cool this hole shifting in animals thing was. and running around with spider climb, in the shape of a bear, running along walls and mauling goblins. Seriously awesome stuff. I need to do it more often. Yea sure being an eagle soaring in the sky and being able to see a mouse in a field is cool and all but mauling ogres and goblins is all sorts of cool.

Ok, so what else did I learn today?

Oh yes, As much as spider bear likes mauling goblins, spider bear does not like wererat ogre chiefteinessessess. They hit hard, are hard to hurt, and well they hit really hard. Thank the gods the b!tch didn’t bite me otherwise it would be evil were-rat spider bear going around mauling peasant or something like that.

so yea the were-b!tch almost killed me as I was battling her, I managed to use the last of my strength to jump off of a walkway to ‘safety’ and throwing the prayer beads out there for someone to heal me with. I think it was Fortus, or maybe Gray who did it. But I wake up, the were rate is standing over me battling Fortus so I nail her with an icelance in the back (that was cool too, now if only spider bear could shoot lances of Ice as well) and she decided to run away. Good riddance.

Mopping up the rest of the goblins was easy enough.

and gerrett once again proved that he is vastly superior to Darius, and has yet to try to touch my butt, or watch me while I’m bathing. (and if he has done that at least he has the decency enough to be sneaky about it).

So we got rat chicks scabbard back for her, and the witches ring so we decided to go meet up with her and find out how to find this witch she is speaking of and put an end to the threat to Whitecliff. Hey, an indirect thread to the farmers on the frontier who provide Whitecliff with food is a threat to whitecliff itself.

Dear Diary,

Things do not look good. As a matter of fact I think we are totally screwed. But at least this time Kale is awake so we can all get hosed.

We met up with Tessa and found out how to work the ring to find the witch. and well we found her In a giant hole in the ground filled with those flying ball of darknesses, minus the darkness but still not a nice thing to see (I believe the witch is cross breeding manticores and griffons to create these things, the griffon isn’t surviving the process either).

So yea the witch has dug a fortress out of the earth, so what do we do? he decide to go inside. A brief fight with a human and a minotaur later we get inside. of course hey know we are coming, the human sent a little demon looking thing to make sure of that. so walking around the Witches delve we see a lot of those balls of darkness and finally get to the bottom to find the witch (surrounded by a whole bunch of things that are going to try to turn our bones to paste). Kale gets us in by disguising himself as the human we killed at the entrance, and Fortus (bless his heart, he’s trying) is trying to negotiate peace with the witch (I would do it but spider bear doesn’t talk). But she is hell bend on getting revenge for her people because the whitecliff people took over their land or something like that. Basically this is going to end in blood, the question is how much if is going to be theirs and how much is going to be ours).

PS: yes I am writing this in my journal in the meeting room with the witch while Fortus is trying to talk us out of battle (which is odd because normally his MO is kill them all). And while spider bear may not be able to talk, spider bear is able to write, but her handwriting is TERRIBLE. I’m going to have to transcribe this if I survive this.

As you can tell from the fact that I am writing this (and rewriting the previous entry) that I somehow managed to survive the encounter with the Witch. I would say that things didn’t exactly go as planned but that would imply that we had a plan to begin with. Plans are definitely not something that we are all that good at formulating.

So the discussions finished, the witch is hell bent on exterminating Whitecliff and turning this land back into march. So she, her man at arms, and Kale (still disguised) left the room leaving us to fight lizard men and Merrow in a room that was rapidly flooding.

Yea, not good.

we busted open the door and ran for our lives.

only to find ourselves trapped by a minotaur opening the cage doors and releasing the animals within. Merrow behind us and a gauntlet of half starved griffins and such ahead of us. Not being able to move forward or backwards we decided to go a different route: to the side, out through the cage and up the wall of the pit. spiderclimb is a very useful spell I am finding.

So we managed to get away from the pit, ran like hell and were eventually found by the flying creatures the witch has been breeding, and it called a bunch of warg riders to come finish us off.

You know that lack of planning I was lamenting earlier? well it reared its ugly head again as I was told to cast entangle on the warg riders and we just kept running only to have them catch up with us again. So the second time they showed up we decided to something smart like actually fighting them while they were stuck in the entangle. and thankfully the entangle did its trick and we were able to fight off the wargs, their rider and the flying thing without them all massing up on us.

After that we managed to make it back to Myrle’s farm without further incident only to find Kale was already there and he claims he had taken out like 5 of the flying things single handedly.

Well we were outclassed so what do we do? we send a message to mom and in a couple of days she shows up with a bunch of rangers and knights from whitecliff and go looking for the witch. a few days after that they come back and say that the enemy has fled to the winds and head back towards whitecliff for whatever reason. well all except Stig but ill get to that later.

So while mom was out mopping up bad guys and threats Fortus thought it would be a good idea to take on a giant, some ogres and a bunch of goblins by himself. At least his wolf had enough good sense to come back to the farm and get the rest of us. It was a good thing too, by the time we got to where the battle was happening Fortus was knocking on death’s door and death had already undead the deadbolt and was getting ready to let Fortun in. So then I, you know a 2 foot something Halfling had to protect fortus from a GIANT.

Long story short, we all survived, the giants were dead and Jack showed up with Glip (who met mom) and finished off the last ogre.

and back to Meryls for dinner, this time with jack. it has good to see him. what we talked about I’m not even going to put to paper here. Sorry diary, that is between me and Jack.

So you know how I mentioned Stig? Well Orick thought it would be a good idea to leave him behind to babysit us. like we need anyone else from Whitecliff around here bumbling things up (other than mom).

So anyway Jack wanted me to look into something so everyone else was kind enough to tag along as we headed back west, past the pit and into the swamp. it appears that a blighter has been busy blighting the land, and well we just cant have that not can we. we found a Merrow village where I managed to get some information on where the source of the blight was coming from and we headed that way. and that is when things started to go bad.

we found the witch, and her two sisters, with a bunch of merrow, a giant and her pet croc. and last I saw they were winning.

Dear Diary,

Yes as you can see I am still alive. We managed to win after all. I’m still not sure all that happened but we survived… well at least most of us did. Garrett fell in battle and kale finally showed up to help us out. The hags finally fell to us. Yes hags, did I forget to mention that? yea the Witch, she was really a hag, and a blighter on top of that. Yup the story just keeps getting better and better doesn’t it.

so after the fight we did what any intelligent group would have done. We looted the bodies and ran like hell. We holed up in some rooms on an upper level and rested and tried to recover. that is of course until a bunch of zombies decided to attack us. Yup, everything we killed yesterday decided that being dead was boring and it would be a good idea to attack us. and they brought along some ghoul friends…. or maybe it was Ghasts, I never could tell the two apart.

So again being all beat up we debated departing the caverns but opted instead to try the rooms for another night.

Dear diary.
Ok so a lot has happened since the last time I talked to you.

So after the zombie fight we were left alone for a couple of days [purposefully omitting any reference to the creepy doll]. When we went back down to the lower levels we got to meet with another hag. This one had a much higher respect for her own life than the ones to decided to wage war on whitecliff. anyone she surrendered to us gave us a prisoner and let us go on our merry way which I was more than happy to do. that is of course except for the fact that this prisoner just so happened to be a Lighhammer. It wasn’t bad enough that we had Styg Lighthammer following us around, now Hogren was with us.

Well fine, its more than past time to go home and I guess Hogren can come with us. once we are back to Whitecliff I won’t have to deal with him anymore.

So the trip back to Home was about as boring as the trip from home. Except this time we had heard all of Kale’s stories already and was able to down him out, except for his yelling every time his bunny decided to jump. which was about every other step.

[still omitting anything about any creepy dolls]

So after a few weeks later there was a visitor to Home looking for mom. after the visitor left Mom summoned me and asked me in the way mom’s ask that means you can’t say no even though they say that you can to go investigate a missing children problem in a small village about a week away.

Ok fine, lets go rescue children.

So I send a message to Fortus to gather up everyone and meet me at home, we are called to duty again. I suppose I shouldn’t have specifically said not to bring any of the Lighhammers, but I didn’t so you can imagine my dismay when he came to Home with Styg and Hogren in tow.

After traveling with them for a week, Styg isn’t that bad but Hogren…. Seriously I have met rocks with more of a sense of humor than that guy. and on top of that he treats me like a child. I swear some day I’m going to turn into a dragon or a giant lizard or a giant something and eat him is he keeps it up.

So it turns out lots of kids have been going missing and the most likely suspect is this cult of the third moon or something like that. We went around and asked people a bunch of questions, tomorrow we are probably going to the cultist. Oh and the night that the kids go missing on, if they do go missing is coming up in two days. How is that for timing.

Dear Diary,

So I haven’t had time to get back to filling you on what has been going on. I’ve been running half way across the country so that we could get the supplies to fight some vampires. No I’m not talking about the sun., though I am pretty sure that will come into play at some point, I’m talking about some silver sheen. Without it fighting vamps is very difficult, or at least that’s what Surefyne said. But anyway I’m getting ahead of myself.

by the way, has anyone seen Kale lately?

So the good news and the bad news. The good news is that by harnessing the infinite powers of nature I was able to pierce unknown distances and pierced the veil to find the wee lass that went missing. She is still alive. The bad new is that I really have no definitive answer to where she is but she is alive and being held prisoner. Alright so maybe not so infinite powers. So all evidence points to the child being taken by the cultists in the tower, can’t prove it and showing up will just make things worse I am sure so we need to figure out something else.

So it’s about time for that third moon mumbo jumbo night so here’s the plan, or rather the plan was: We are going to let the next kid get nabbed. Then we are going to track the kidnappers to the tower and rescue the new kid, the girl and put an end to the kidnapping. Perfect, I mean really what could possibly go wrong?

So we are pretty sure the kidnappers are from the tower, so I’m going to go keep an eye on the tower and everyone else is going to hang out around town to try to stop the kidnapping if nothing else. Well once again the infinite power of nature has left a bit to be desired: a thick unnatural fog rolled in and I couldn’t see anything. So I have no idea what happened, and of course since kale wasn’t there to tell me 50 times how awesome he was during the night of fog and what he did (and I could assume was mostly a team effort exaggerated by a factor of ten), I have no idea what really happened.

all I know is that eventually they all showed up at the tower. It seems our suspicions here right so we decided to go in. Of course I suggested we go over the wall instead of through the gate but nobody listens to me and as soon as they stepped through the gate there was a massive disembodied scream. Oh and get this, once we stepped into the courtyard and looked up to the sky, you know what we saw? That’s right, a third moon. So maybe these kidnapping cultists aren’t completely off their rockers. Or if they are the third moon isn’t a symptom of it.

So we made our way across the court yard and kicked open the door if classic Fortus style and we see 4 women and the kid in a pool of water doing gods know what (and I am pretty sure this kid wasn’t old enough to have those type of autoerotic fantasies yet, if he was about 5 years older….) And thus the intrepid heroes began battle with the evil cultists and we pretty much got our butts kicked again because they were vampires and we were totally not ready to handle that. In the end we grabbed the boy and ran like our tail feathers were on fire…. not that the others would know what that is like not having tail feathers but you know what I mean.

So now that he are night fighting for our very souls at the moment we have to make some plans, of course those plans are to go back and kick the vampires butts during the day when we have some measure of advantage (if you didn’t know that advantage would be the giant glowing ball of fire in the sky). and some silver sheen to actually be able to hurt the wenches. And thus began the cross country run for Gray and me.

Alright, Plan set: kick in the front door kick vampire butt.

So back to the tower we go prepared for holy war against the forces of the undead. We again go through the front gate and again the disembodied scream (seriously are these guys ever going to learn? I mean I know they aren’t going to listen to me but we do have two clerics who are usually known for being wise). So the first monkey wrench just got tossed into our plans. Once we entered the courtyard guess what? no sun, and 3 moons in the sky. That is going to make things difficult. So again the testosterone crazed force that drives the party forward (and shall remain nameless) kicked in the front door and into the tower we all go. Except once inside we cant see anything. The room is filled with fog. and worse than that I hear a couple of loud booms and then nothing else. I cant see anything and I cant hear anything. With nothing else to do I try to make my way back outside. So I hope the guys are winning because the are a whole bunch of wolves out here and they don’t look like the friendly type. If you don’t mind me I’m just going to climb this wall right here to get out of the range of their jaws.

I really hope the guys are winning.

Dear Diary (06-13-14)

So I think I’m starting to turn around on my opinion of these cult vampire women. Ok sure they are undead. Unnatural things that feed on the life essence of living things. And they kidnap children, well i guess somebody has to want them. The children should feel special. but aside from all of that someone there has a really nice bed room. complete with its own slave pen. I mean really how cool is that. Mom won’t let me keep slaves at Home, and I cant leave them tied to a tree in the woods, last time i did that they died and were eaten by coyotes. So really, how bad could someone be with such a nice bedroom, a lovely view of the country side and it their own personal slave pin.

So I eventually found the guys, they were alright after all, that’s a good thing. I really wish I could hear stuff again, this ringing in my ears is getting really annoying.

So anyway I met back up with the guys, showed them my new bedroom. It’s mine, i’ve claimed it. and they killed some more cultist and then we fought the beholder. Let me tell you something about beholders, pfffft. I mean seriously when i heard mom and her friends talk about the one they killed in the mountains in some mission to rescue some princess from some half dragon named Bowser or something like that you would think they would be really tough. We kicked this things multi eyed floating balled butt…. do beholders have butts? anyway….

well i have to go, they guys are telling me to stop writing and follow along.

I really do not like this place. So we left the beholder den and met a whole bunch of little boys. Kind of. Not really little boys per say but some for of soul sucking disembodied undead babble creatures that were the form of little boys.

We eventually found their bodies just stacked in a room being consumed by carrion crawlers. but I’m ahead of myself here. So yea, those disembodied boys, well they make Fortus about as dumb as a box of rocks and he went wondering off into nothingness. Oh yea and Kale showed up. he found a back door to the tower.

So we rested up, healed up, get Fortus and Strokey their common sense back and got ready to go back into the stupid tower.


It has delighted me greatly to read this account of my daughter’s journey. I also must say that some of what I have read has disturbed me as well. The thoughts and feelings that she had being sent on these tasks and well as the impressions some of her companions have left her with tells me that Whitecliff may have something to worry about as the youths grow in character and accomplishments.

Kelly fell in battle against the vampire cultist that her and the other children were battling against. Her body was returned to Whitecliff by way of a celestial messenger but her soul chose to stay on the other side due to her respect for the natural cycle of life and death.

It is a sad day when any mother has to bury her child but I know that her sacrifice was not in vain and that her efforts have saved many lives in Whitecliff and beyond.

May she rest in peace and I hope that none of the other lords will have to experience this.

—Lorik Matterhorn

Kelly Adventure Journal

Lords of Whitecliff St_Nougat